if i have enough time to randomly rant like an ass, then i have time to do allnighters for the next 2 days to catch up. punishment brought upon oneself indeed, but oh well. need to rant now before i start screaming and bitching at people (more so) for no reason. self reflection and maniacal rambling commence!
so where to start. "go get a fucking" job is one, but after school, but wait, i'm moving at that time? AN is gonna be a fun and tortuous journey, i will guarantee... we will see how that unrolls. hopefully tortuous then all paid off by fun, preferably, but we will see x_x but now is not the time to worry about AN, because my supposed future relies on school.
where have i lost all this will and motivation? i have no clue. i wish i can "stop being a fucking emo", but y'know... we all get a l'il emo sometimes, so no biggie... just that it's been happening for the past few months and counting. but then again, there are people i care about who are in seriously far worse situations, so i should shut my mouth. i'm fully aware of my actions, i just don't know what to do (let's go check that mental health です!). so for the people i know, i deeply apologize if my bipolar arsehole-icness is getting to you, i will try to stop. i know, all i'm good for is apologizing to people ._. seriously, or just avoid me for a while ;0
i will get my crap sorted out before having something horrible happen to me in order to learn my lesson, but let us hope for the former.
lyrics from chick habit's hitting me. even though the context of the song does not relate to me whatsoever, but this set of the lyrics... XD;;
you're gonna see the reason why
when they're spitting in your eye
they'll be spitting in your eye
y'know, this is more fitting of an LJ kinda thing, if y'know... i didn't have horrible memory and constantly forgetting them pwz.
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Mood:
Shitty -
Listening to: chick habit - april march
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Reading: too much...
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Watching: missing lost for now =_=
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Playing: nothing
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Eating: bootlegged cake
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Drinking: water
Sorry things are so frustrating. I went for MONTHS (about 8) with NO motivation for anything... so I know it f'n sucks. Hopefully things will turn around and depression will leave your ass alone.
Just try and stay optimistic and keep doing your best. Take care and don't pull your hair out!
Hopefully things will kick back up for you soon! ^^