I am semi-alive. Yay. Although I've been spamming my facebook to no end about the concert, I need a place to properly reiterate and elaborate on my nonsensical, fantarded rants, because I am on an obsessive high. As per usual.

Let the ETERNAL maniacal-fangirlish ranting begin:

What to say... It's been exactly three years and a month since I've last seen Dir en grey live (The Rose Trims Again tour). Didn't get to see them with Apocalyptica last year, because of work. Admittedly, when I first heard the news that they were coming back to perform in the summer, I wasn't really hyped. Probably because I had already seen them once and was settled with my infatuation. Which is really ironic, because looking back at my old post, I was going on and on about how much they are worth the watch, etc, etc, etc.

After a few months of indecisiveness, I finally bought my ticket in the beginning of December. That took long enough. Listened to Dum Spiro Spero for the remaining days up until the concert as a kind of count-down in attempts to hype myself up. The album is pretty good, although I liked Uroboros a biiiit better. But that will be another rant for another day   

Sooo... fast forward to concert day. Waited in the cold for what felt like a long arse time. But this is mainly due to the fact that it was -freezing-. And I was appropriately dressed for the weather, mind you.   

PRECURSOR CONCERT RAMBLING:

Thoughts of the venue: The Phoenix Concert Theatre was small-ish, but comfy. In comparison to Kool Haus, it's a bit more compact, and... red?   

In terms of my placement in the crowd... almost exactly where I was when I first saw them; semi-front right-ish. In simpler terms, I had Die-vision. Next time I will have mah Kaoru/Toshiya vision. BUT, amazingly... they were not stationed in their usual spots throughout the show, which really took me by surprise. But that will be further elaborated in another section.  

Onto opening/supporting act.The Birthday Massacre was surprisingly good. They managed to hype the crowd up pretty quickly. Although I actually think a portion of the crowd was specifically there just to see them - which is kinda cool, and I can see why. But nonetheless, they got the job done and was well-received by the audience.  

CONCERT RAMBLING:

Sound-check took unbelievably long. And even after the show has started, Kyo's mic was acting up. So for the first three-four songs... didn't really hear him D:  

For those interested in the setlist: [link]

So after the little mishaps, the real fun began. Notable (imo) performances were:

• The Blossoming Beelzebub - Fav song from their album, and the live did not disappoint. For some reason, this song reminds me of a more updated "Macabre".
• 「欲巣にDREAMBOX」あるいは成熟の理念と冷たい雨 - No other words to say other than I luuurved it.
• Rotting Root - An older song, but it got everyone headbanging nonetheless.
• Red Soil - Another fav. from Uroboros; demented and fun vibes.   
• 鼓動 - I was sort of expecting The Final to be in the encore, but instead we got treated with our beloved Kodou <3 I sang/screamed along until my voice got hoarse.

• Inward Scream (especially the second act): Kyo's voice is indescribable at times. And this performance was proof. My jaw dropped to his performance, it was insane.

Onto ze members and mah rambling fangirlism:

• Kaoru - As mentioned 10 billion times before, I always get the "awww yeahz, mofos" aura from him. Or at least when I managed to get a glimpse of him. Stern, but always rocking out - his presence and sound is just something you don't want to mess with ._.

• Toshiya - Insanely (cannot stress that enough) hyperactive. In a very good way. And my goodness, how he continuously teased and gestured the crowd. Also, I didn't know he had a good screaming voice 'til I witnessed Different Sense live. This man was wild with the bass, I tells you.

• Kyo: His energy for that night was phenomenal. I was somewhat expecting his voice to be worn out considering how far into the tour we're in, but it wasn't! Crazy vocal power and range. And with my usual preconceptions of Kyo mainly being dead serious/psychotic - he seemed to be really enjoying himself on stage?!! I cannot explain it other than it seemed like he was actually happy... Yes, I am shocked.

On another note, Kyo's also got some bird contortionist moves up his sleeve, which was just as hypnotic as his erotic eel dance back in '08 (yes, I coined farked up names for his movements). We also got his "heart beats" (exactly what it means, beating his heart with the mic), in which it was my first time witnessing it live.

• Shinya - Poundin' them drums like a psychopath, keeping us all pumped up. I'm still amazed at the amount of force he puts into drumming, considering his frame. I say he has arms of steel. And dat's why u dun underestimate him, yo.    

• Die - Am I the only one who thought he was extremely pissed off during most of the concert? Or is it because the last memory of Die I had engrained in my mind was him smiling a lot and looking happy that's making me think that?! Either way, he seemed to have a pissed/unamused expression. And because of that, a lot of my focus shifted onto him x_x;;   

From time to time, he'd play with his back turned and hood on towards Shinya..? Unless that's his way of performing, then ok. But when Kodou was on, I felt his passion/intensity re-sparked, which made me a happy little mofo. I have this newfound love for Die all of a sudden ._.

RANDOM HIGHLIGHTS:

• The band going crazy during Rasetsukoku. They actually started running all over the place, hanging off the edge of the stage. I remember everyone just touching and grabbing onto Die's legs. Kaoru and Toshiya also gave our side a nice visit <3 And then, as I will coin from a fellow fan, a bro-moment between Die and Toshiya playing/leaning back to back ;_; They really... really seemed to be having fun in their last performance, and that is something I am not used to seeing, but am extremely happy to have witnessed.

• Kyo clapping at the end. I am not lying. I don't know if that is something new he does, but literally, wtfudge (I know, I have a horrible dark, gloomy preconception of this band in my mind). Kaoru and Toshiya also started clapping, and Toshiya actually stood up on Kyo's mini-stage and bowed at us. And me not being crazy, Kyo did that "I got jooh in mah heart u mofo" gesture to us again before leaving. T'was touching ;__;  

• Toshiya's gestures/movements in general. I can't describe how entertaining it was to watch. He probably usually does this, but I think because of the size of the stage (which was relatively small), I actually had a decent view.

• Die celebrating by drinking some kind of wine at the end of the concert.

• Revisiting a wonderful deja-vu: Getting blinded/cooled off by the water Die threw/splashed at us from his bottle again.

CROWD IMPRESSION:

In a non-offensive way, or perhaps because I am semi-tall, the height of most of the crowd was on the short end? Which was awesome in a sense that I had a damned good view from where I was.

Overall, I think our crowd was a pretty good one in terms of our energy and participation, which is a theory of mine as to why we were applauded by the band. Many of us had the power to keep screaming/chanting for the encore and went crazy in general.

Now, for the exceptions of making us an even more epic crowd: People trying to kill each other during most of the band's performance, or y'know, moshing and "bonding through violence". (And yes, I am aware in these kinds of concerts, it's natural for people to be extremely stupid, violent and insane - but this doesn't stop me from ranting).

*Swearing galore*

Don't know what the fuck drugs they were on, but because of their recklessness, they ended up getting a HUGE amount of empty crowd space dedicated to their stupidity. It was sort of sad/funny, as the rest of the crowd in that area (mainly ze girlies), were squished/edging as far away as possible, creating this empty space. I should know, as I was one of them. Because if you were to go into their "space", get ready to be mauled. My message: go fucking play fight club somewhere else.   

^Although in a very twisted sense, it would be ironic that the band enjoyed us as an audience because of the senseless violence they induced on these people through their music x__o;; Maybe they like the carnage, haha OTL

Although I got it lucky with what I had to witness. Apparently, there was a person who would start biting people (to the point that they bled) in order to move further up to the front? Really? Are you fucking serious? Should I start shanking people to get up closer next time?

Other than that, I didn't really let that get to me too much - no one is worthy enough to wreck my time enjoying the concert. NO ONE.  

FINAL THOUGHTS:

Although I will admit that I preferred The Rose Trims Again a tiny bit better (considering it was my first time seeing them). But with how much fun the band seemed to have as the concert progressed, it was still a very enjoyable concert.

I seriously think that it's the concerts that re-spark my obsessive love for them x_x;; I know this will not be the last time I see them live. NOTE TO SELF, THEY ARE TOTALLY FUCKING WORTH THE WATCH - SO DON'T BE AN INDECISIVE MOFO THE NEXT TIME THEY TOUR. And I swear to meet them one day. Somehow. Although those meet and greets seemed forced on their end, so I can always dream meeting them on some kind of happenstance. //keep dreaming.

But honestly, they are still my favourite band. The messages/emotions conveyed through their music/lyrics is something very personal to me. Many may think it's because I like fucked up things that I view them as some kind of gimmicky muse to fangirl about. Sure I can be a shallow fangirl, but surprisingly enough, there is a bit more depth than that.

I think many can relate to music having a big impact/influence in their lives - be it the emotional connections or the therapeutic aspects to it. Dir en grey was sort of my emotional/therapeutic outlet for almost the last seven years. Especially during the times where things went to shit, or the times where I just wanted to scream everything out but just couldn't - it was literally their music that was my release.  

I am not particularly articulate nor eloquent when it comes to presenting my thoughts, (other than the usual "Lawlz, omgah, imma be random/stupid"). So I'll just end it off by saying that you can perceive this band in whatever way you like (be it epic, epic phailz or whatever), it ain't changing my love and respect for them.